March 8, 2008

Why SHOULD you breast-feed?

We often hear from women how hard it is/was to breast-feed. Some of these well-meaning women may have been there themselves, but many never gave it a go OR approached it with little to no knowledge or desire. You can look up the benefits of breast-feeding and any medically based site will tout it's benefits. We all KNOW that breast-feeding your child is the best thing you can do for them, but here's some reasons why you should straight from the mouth of a mother.

Why do I think you might care what I have to say? Well, I've been on BOTH sides of the fence. Actually, I've been on both sides as well as balancing ON the fence. I have only recently been able to come to terms with some of the guilt I feel over my past choices, and I would HATE for any other woman to have to struggle with the guilt I did simply because you, like I, were uninformed.

So, here are my personal reasons on why *I* think *you* should breast-feed your baby(ies).

  1. It is the biological norm- your baby's tummy is designed for consumption of breast-milk. A baby's digestive tract is sensitive and it is susceptible to bacteria. The phrase "breast is best" isn't really the best term, it should be "breast is normal", because it's the STANDARD for optimum infant health.
  2. It's FREE!- When I informed my husband that I would be breast-feeding our son come hell or high water, his reaction was simple "Cool, because formula's freakin' expensive!". It wasn't until I educated him more, during my pregnancy, on the benefits of breast-feeding, and even after watching his son thrive on my milk, that he looked at it for it's many other benefits. To him, in the beginning, it was simply enough that we would save, literally, THOUSANDS of dollars by breast-feeding.
  3. It's easy- it might not always be easy in the beginning, and yes, many mom's DO face hardships with nursing (though many can be avoided with good education on nursing and/or professional help from an LC) but once you've established your nursing relationship, NOTHING is easier than expose breast and attach baby. That's it, you're done! No lugging around powder, sterile water, clean bottles AND a baby! Boobs are attached, portable, and always ready to go!
  4. It's soothing- and not just for baby! Yes, it's true, breast-feeding will calm a fussy baby or whiney toddler like nothing else can, but it is also quite comforting and soothing for mom, both metaphorically as well as literally. When you nurse, you release oxytocin (the feel-good bonding hormone) and seratonin (the sleepy one!) which puts you (and baby) in a state of goo-goo-ga-ga lovey bliss!
  5. It HELPS PPD- Breast-feeding can help keep PPD (Post Partum Depression) away as well as help it to be less severe. In the event that you still experience PPD to the point of needing medication, there are medications you can take while nursing that will not hurt the baby.
  6. It's educational- What? How is breast-feeding educational? Well, let me tell you! When yo breast-feed, other people will inevitably see you doing it! If you have older children, they will undoubtedly be around as you feed the baby, and if they are anything like mine, they will ask questions! This is the PERFECT time to share the beauty of breast-feeding with your children. Remember, they are the future! You can also educate OTHERS by breast-feeding. If you are breast-feeding in public, there may likely come a time when someone confronts you about it (either positively or negatively) and BOTH circumstances can prove benefitial to their breast-feeding education! If it's a negative reaction (usually pertaining to whether you are in the right for breast-feeding in public) you can give them a legal education, as almost every state has a law for breast-feeding mothers, and to my knowledge, NONE have a law AGAINST it! I carry a copy of my state's legislation in my wallet. If it is a POSITIVE encounter, you can perhaps tell an inquisitive person WHY you breast-feed, encourage them to keep going (if THEY are breast-feeding) and all in all, give them exposure to breast-feeding which is helping to remind people it's NORMAL.
  7. It's fun- it really is! Especially as your child grows, breast-feeding can become acrobatic and humorous! As you gaze down at your little one suckling away at your breast, you get smiles, giggles, and even the occasional game of peek-a-boo as your baby hides in your breast. Sometimes, the world just melts away as you enter your own little world.
  8. It eases baby to sleep- Instead of resorting to possibly damaging methods like CIO (Cry It Out) or having to spend hours rocking, singing or DRIVING to get your baby to go to sleep, you can simply lay with and nurse your child into a peaceful state of slumber. Granted, all babies are different, and what works for one might not work for all, but I have yet to meet a breast-feeding mother who couldn't simply lay with and nurse her little one to sleep, even into the difficult i'llkickandscreamtogetmywayandavoidbedtime toddler years.
  9. It's bonding- You hear it all the time, and if you are or have been a formula/bottle feeder, it may jab you the wrong way, putting you on the defense to say "I'm BONDED with my baby! You can bottle-feed and bond ALSO!". Well, no one said you CAN'T bond with a baby despite bottle-feeding. The difference is HOW you bond and how WELL you bond. Breast-feeding gives you skin-to-skin contact, something very essential to newborn bonding. There is no other choice, if you breast-feed, you WILL be skin-to-skin with baby. Also, your breasts are attached to you, meaning there is NO option for NOT holding your baby when you feed them. Even when laying down, you are in contact with your baby. I know many bottle-feeding mothers that SWEAR they have never bottle propped, but truth be told, you WILL do it at some point, it's undeniable. It doesn't mean you ALWAYS bottle prop, but you will be much more inclined to do so, especially when you're trying to get things done and the darn baby just doesn't understand you can't drop everything for them right now! And let's not forget, baby's do learn how to hold bottles, and while they can also hold breasts, they can't exactly do it ALL on their own! Feeding is a very important time for baby, it is important that they are held, so even if you aren't nursing, please, hold your baby.
  10. Your child will thank you- I have actually thanked my mother for breast-feeding me. I think it is so wonderful that she made the little sacrifices in order to provide me with the best start in life. She breast-fed me EXCLUSIVELY for my first year of life. I am so happy to know that my mom held me and cuddled me and comforted me, just like I do my son, while also providing me with the most nutritious food for me! I just recently spoke with my friend who discovered she was bottle-fed and when she asked her mom why, she said she just "wasn't comfortable doing that." My friend's response was "Gee, THANKS, mom!" (obviously she was being sarcastic). If your child is still young, they will thank you each time they nurse, just by gazing at you with that intensity, rubbing your breast as they fall to sleep. If your child is a toddler nursing, they may thank you verbally, with something like "Thanks for giving me your yummy milk, mommy!". Even if you're never given a verbal thanks, the appreciation will be there, at some point. You will know, just watching your child thrive off the milk you provide for them, that they are thankful. They are thankful they have a mommy who cares, a mommy who loves them, a mommy who sacrifices to give them the norm, the standard, the best.
If you choose not to breast-feed, I hope that you (and your child) never suffer any guilt from the decision. I say that from the bottom of my heart, having been in a position of regret. If you choose to breast-feed, make sure you have a system of support. Educate yourself in pregnancy by reading books like "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" (put out by LLL) or "So That's What They're For", join a group like La Leche League (membership is not required to attend meetings or even borrow from the library) and make sure if birthing in the hospital you have in your birth plan that you wish to see an LC immediately following birth. Arming yourself with knowledge PRIOR to having your baby will help you feel more confident and will also help you counter any difficulties that may arise early. It is a selfless act to breast-feed, and your baby will benefit greatly from your choice to do so!

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

If you choose not to breastfeed, there is always that possibility of regret. On the other hand, there has NEVER been anyone that looked back and said "I regret breastfeeding". You just *can't* regret breastfeeding!

Kate said...

thank you, tess! I have to agree...you simply cannot regret that decision unless you regret that you stopped.

smileyes said...

Hi, When I first began reading your blog I thought that you seemed a judgemental and overbearing, it didn't seem as if you were giving people advice but arguing that "your way" is the only way to do things. Now that I see the transformation that you have made in your own personal life I realize where you are coming from. Your posts have also changed. Now they reflect the help/advice that you want to give to others that you had not received yourself (as opposed to just telling people what they should do. I had many problems with breastfeeding - and yes I did go to a nursing consultant. When the Medela Pump in Style pump that EVERYONE had was not working for me I went out and rented a hospital grade pump, so in addition to the Medela pump that I had bought (you can't return it once it is opened) I know spent the extra money on renting another pump. Still I needed to supplement with formula. I am hoping that G-d willing things will be better with my next child. I will definitely come back to visit your blog since you have interesting things to say and seem to have a lot of personal experiences to share with others. Please come and visit my blog also.

Kate said...

Thanks smileyes. I know that many times it may seem that I do come off as overbearing and judgemental and it's not that I mean to be but more, like you said, that I have come a LONG way and just have so much passion for the knowledge I've gained. I am so sorry you have pumping problems! I am so lucky to have no pumping issues and actually, no reason to pump either. I'm sorry that my tone rubbed you the wrong way at first but I'm glad you relate more to my blog now. I just want to try to get the best information out to people as possible. Sometimes, there IS a right way and a wrong way, we must determine where the line is drawn between our own needs and desires and what's best for our children. I'd love to visit your blog!

smileyes said...

Hi, it's me again. I realized that I never said why I was pumping. I first started because I was told that if I would pump more often (or after my son finishes nursing) it would help to empty the breasts and increase my supply - unfortunately even with the pumping that didn't help. (At least though when I used the hospital grade pump I acutally got something out as opposed to with the other pump). Actually it was pretty funny (and I don't mean to be graphic here) but at the beginning sometimes my breasts would leak but not one drop would come out with the regular pump - so my husband would joke that milk would come out anytime EXCEPT when I was pumping. It was pretty funny. Then I needed to pump because I went back to work - I was pretty good about it - lugging the big pump back and forth every day - its good I have an office and could basically pump whenever I needed (I couldn't even leave it at work bc I liked to pump after my son went to sleep - sometimes I would even get in a power pumping session. I think that you have a lot of knowledge to impart to women and will be sure to call upon you when I am in the situation again. I just do not want you to alienate people who could really use your advice> But as I said before you are making a lot of progress in that area. I am not sure how to put a link to my site in but I believe that if you click on my name it will take you to my profile and then you can go to my blog. Let me know if it doesn't work. Thanks!!

Kate said...

Smileyes: why were you trying to increase supply and what made you think supply was low? Just curious. It might even be that you don't have to supplement. If your child is gaining weight and wetting 6-8 wet diapers, no need for concern. Many women think that what you pump is what you make, but pumping is in no way indicative of supply. The pump is inadequate to the suckle of your babe and some women simply do not respond to a pump while others, like myself, are just VERY lucky. Anyway, just letting you know, the pump can be your best friend (like for a working mom) or your worst enemy (for a mom worried about supply).

smileyes said...

I think that you read the post on my blog so you saw what I wrote but the reason that I felt that I had to increase was bc since my son started spitting up a lot his doctor thought that it was bc I was feeding him to often (he wanted to eat all the time which I believe is what happens naturally to increase supply at growth spurts). So since the pediatrician said that i could only feed him every 3 hours (he usually went between 1 and a half to 2 hours) i felt like I had to make sure that he was eating enough if I couldnt feed him again soon. Stupid of me to listen I know now!